Chapter: The Sparkle Factor

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the verb form of SPARKLE (spar·​kle |
\ ˈspär-kəl \ ) as such:

a: to throw about sparks
b: to give off or reflect bright moving points of light
c: to perform brilliantly
d: to cause to glitter or shine

and I can think of no better way to start this chapter with you getting in the SPARKLE FACTOR mindset. So, to begin, are you throwing sparks when you speak? Do your words reflect light? Is your speaking presence filled with luminescent brilliance so that you are leaving those in your presence shining with momentum?
I think it all started because I was born to young parents, on December 23rd. That’s a tough day to it’s so close to Christmas, your friends are always gone, and so many people just wrap birthday presents in Christmas paper. Yes, I’m pretty sure that’s how it all began.
It became a tradition to wear a tiara on my birthday, so amid the hustle and bustle of the holidays, my family (and yes, even now, my friends) watch me wear a tiara on December 23rd…Maybe it was the glitter that would ultimately fall off the tiara…but whatever the reason, inevitably everyone around me would be sprinkled with glitter at some point during the day.
Fast forward to a marriage that crumbled me into a puddle on the floor, while systematically losing my job, my self-esteem and what I thought was my future life. Then one day, in a full-fledged what I thought was a heart situation, but was really my first PTSD filled panic attack, I found myself curled up on the bathroom mat unable to move.
That’s when my friends showed up, put on some ABBA and my brain began to break its horrid cycle of hatred and self-loathing and I began the journey towards grabbing back some of my vacant sparkle. What started as a way to heal myself has become a system of sparkle to help others recapture their mojo, and create a sustainable life of joy, verve and mattering.
And now, lo and behold, I have become known for bringing the sparkle. And that has become a mantra of mine: helping people sparkle. And this chapter is focused on helping YOU sparkle as a speaker!
We are all made of effervescent star-stuff, we are made to sparkle and glint our way through the world, alive to our creativity, our purpose, and our senses. Too often, the hiccup-monotony of daily life floods our overcrowded souls, and our tasks and tedium keep us from pursuing the lives we desire with joyful intention, shining as a beacon in our work.
Be honest. Do you approach each speaking engagement with gusto? with zeal? with verve? Are you so jazzed in your head that every time you speak you make sure that everyone who comes across you leaves with a little more sparkling in their soul from our own soul-light?
Lovely human, unless you are ready to be that stardust, your talks will only be MEH. And who wants MEH? Not this girl. Not your audience. So let’s tackle that mindset, shall we, and see what kind of glittery goodness we can help birth before you take that stage again!
I’m always amazed that so many speakers do not take the time to set intentions as part of their creative practice to craft a talk. See if any of this rings true for you?
You get a gig! (you celebrate—rightly so— and then create a calendar notification.)
You send a contract with your needs.
You jot down a few thoughts after speaking to your event contact about the theme, the audience, and other general what not.
You cull through the keynotes you’ve done before and grab pertinent, funny, amazing content.
You add to your new, open file for this event and get things down.
You rehearse.
You show up and deliver great content to rousing hand claps and hoops and hollers.
(and thus the cycle ends and then continues next gig.)
And until now, I’m thrilled if you follow the above plan! Yay for your system, creative human! However, there’s a crucial step that I believe is holding you back from best the very best speaker you can be: your own mindset and creative practice. But first, a lesson from the creative genius duo of Rodgers and Hammerstein:
“For the world is full of zanies and fools who don’t believe in sensible rules, and don’t believe what sensible people say,” wrote Rodgers & Hammerstein, in their lyrics to the 1964 movie Cinderella. “And because these daft and dewey-eyed dopes keep building up impossible hopes, impossible things are happening everyday!”
While most of us are not concerned with turning pumpkins into carriages, our businesses and our lives could be transformed just as powerfully by thinking “impossible” thoughts, and those thoughts will transform your speaking savvy!
Think about it: How can things ever change—how can our words, our speeches, our keynotes, our system innovate solutions if we can only imagine what has been possible up to now? We might try to fix problems through automation, motivation and process improvement. But ultimately these efforts will stagnate until we change our mental models.

Our perspectives—the lenses through which we perceive and understand the world—affect all that we see, say and do. Problems occur when those perspectives become rigid and function more like prison bars, keeping us locked in set mental models, routines, and behaviors. A quick internet search will yield thousands of articles on the best steps or checklists to solidify your speaking abilities.
What would happen if we broke out of the prison of those perspectives? What new patterns and relationships would we notice? What new actions would we take? How would your speaking elevate?
Thinking impossible thoughts is not just the realm of fairy godmothers or eccentric inventors. We can all zoom in or out of our previous mindsets with a little practice. Start with creating a positive thought process for your speaking. Positive thoughts are your key to achieving your dreams and goals in your speaking career. While being positive isn’t the only ingredient and characteristic necessary, it is an essential one.

Positive thinking starts with you.

Often we look at what we want to achieve in our speaking careers and we’re able to think positively about the goal or the process—but we’re unable to think positively about our abilities.

What topics do you do well on when speaking? Rather than focus on what you’re not so good at, spend time focusing on what you are good at. You will bring more energy and pizzazz when you are speaking from your strengths, so enjoy and relish them! These strengths are what will catapult you to your speaking success. Instead of thinking “I can’t or I won’t be able to,” think, “I can, I will, I am able to.”

Create affirmations for your speaking success.

Affirmations are positive statements that motivate you, inspire you, and keep your spirits and confidence high. Affirmations are personal and can only be written by you. Spend some time thinking about fears, limiting beliefs and areas where you lack confidence and write affirmations to help you change those limits into positive thoughts and positive action.
Success in speaking comes to those who focus on the good, who think positively about themselves and the world, and who can persevere. If you think positively about your dreams and goals until they become part of who you are, then you will be on your way to achieving the success you desire.

Are you beginning to see the sparklers around you? When you begin the creative dreamwork of impossibility, your speaking will transform! Working hard on the creative mindset part of your business will allow you to express your message and create something beautiful each and every time to step out to speak.
Bewitched was and is hands down one of my fave sitcoms EVER. In fact, I own almost all of the seasons and introduced my daughter to its hijinks when she was about 5. There was something truly JOY-FULL about it all. I mean it did tweak 60’s gender roles a bit and became one of the first feminist sitcoms ever produced and for that… well, that’s pretty stunning in and of itself. And for a couple of seasons at least, Bewitched suggested that gimmicks could be used to tell surprisingly deft stories about a changing nation and world, even if everything could be fixed with a quick bit of magic.
People often poke fun at the thought of having a magic wand. I don’t think there’s anything funny about making your life hard. We each have a magic wand called intention. You have to clarify your request and then make the decision that it will be so.
I’m one of the millions of people who’ve talked about this amazing Law of the Universe. It’s been taught throughout the ages. The Law of the Universe states:
all thoughts turn into things eventually.
If you focus on negative doom and gloom you will remain under that cloud. If you focus on positive thoughts and have goals that you aim to achieve you will find a way to achieve them with massive action. That’s where the magic wand of intention comes into play and most folks aren’t picking it up enough!
I used to grab mine only when I wanted something big… a vacation, a new car, or new living space. But what if you used your magic wand on your business? on your speaking? on transformation of where you are now to where you want to be?
If you’re not asking for what you want internally and externally on a moment-to-moment basis, the greatest your life will be is “fine.” I’m asking you to make a conscious decision to make your life off-the-hook SPARKLY-MOJO-CAN’T-STOP-MY-SPARKLY-MOXIE-GREAT!
And the great part is, anything you are currently experiencing in your business, your personal life, etc. that slows down your progress towards that sparkly mojo (or it stopping it cold in its tracks), is the perfect opportunity for YOUR. MAGIC. WAND.

I start with:
1. What’s the real issue at hand?
2. What would be better?
3. If I could have anything I wanted regarding this issue, what would it be?

Then whip out that wand like your hair is on fire and decide right then and there that this situation will not only resolve itself, but you will get everything you want and more.

Sounds simple. But it takes absolute power, internal alignment, and confidence to trust that you are worthy of exactly what you want, and then demand it from life. Your magic wand is powerful in ALL situations. Use liberally.

So think about this you sparkly souls:

If you had a magic wand, how could you create a business where you speak often, with effervescence and joy and glittery goodness?

You see when you are transformed, you transform others AND your situation at the same time. I told you that magic wand was full of sparkly power!
It would be easy to be that woman curled up on the bathroom floor, waiting for the next anxiety-ridden moment to come stealing all of my joy. And if I lived that life, I’d never get on a stage. But when you decide with all the wonder, awe, and joy you can muster that YOU.WILL amazing opportunities come your way to serve others. Believe in yourself. Trust your magic wand. Throw some glittery confetti in the air…because you, beloved human, are the stuff of the stars!